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 In the Books! Week 13 of 2017

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Minnesota Eternals
 
 
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PostSubject: In the Books! Week 13 of 2017   Fri Dec 08, 2017 6:16 pm



Week 13.  The first round of the playoffs.  The first stage of War.  This is the time when some are trying to salvage what they can from 2017 by gaining a few extra WB or earning some pity dollars while a few others still have hope that they won't be one the inevitable fallen as we find out who our champion is this year.  Let's find out what happened this past week...

The score of the week (362.88) goes to the Littleton Silverballers for the second week in a row.  Derrick's confidence has never been higher which is hard to believe and it's no wonder the Dragons were afraid to take em on in Week 14.  The Silverballers are running hot....what ever could go wrong?  Evil laugh


The largest score that lost (294.16) went to the Rocky Mountain Oysters who faced the mighty Goon Squad at the wrong damn time.  Somewhere Russ is snickering at it all.


In the NFL Pick'em side game, I won with 125 points.  I've never won before so clearly you are all idiots.  


Over to the Survivor pool, where 4 teams remain.  Someone needs to get fucked over.


No players scored enough to discuss or break any records so that's good for my tired ass.


And our fair maiden Progressive Pot has not been harmed thankfully.  She's at $1347 and let's keep it that way for a bit.



Anything else of note?

The California Nightmare and Bergen Brawlers combined for 454.54 points which ties for the 8th lowest combined total in league history.  


To go along with that. the California Nightmare posted 242.52 points in a victory which is also 8th all-time for lowest scores that resulted in a victory.  Reach for the stars buddy!


Last week I overlooked the fact that the England Dragons scored 3963.28 points in this regular season which is 5th all-time for a single season.  May this accomplishment be followed up by a nosedive in Week 14 like we've never seen before.   Evil laugh


Also, 3 people hit the all-time scoreboard for lowest point totals in a regular season.  With 3093 points, the Degenitals put up the 8th lowest EVER, with 2908 the Muskies are the 3rd worst EVER and the Nightmare with 2860 are the 2nd lowest EVER which is just 35 better than the worst ever by the Degenitals from last year.  Wow, has there ever been more suckitude in one sentence in the history of mankind?




How bout those results?

Ugh.  Do I look like I have time for this shit?

If you remember last week, Stylianos was playing with his hose and the Eternals were at the receiving end of that bullshit.  Well in Week 13 they faced off again and well...nobody fucks with the Eternals, let's just say that.


Bern and the Nighthawks made the playoffs in their first season and...oh....nevermind. Silverbullets win.


Ben's Bombers arrogantly came to the playoffs and gave Han-Yang and the Golddiggers a really insulting slap that knocked the original right out.


The Divine faced the Pigskins and we all watched looking for a sign...well I think we got a pretty clear one from somebody upstairs...Goddamn ain't fuckin' around.


So the Muskies lost.  Shocking I know.  The fucked up part is the Tyrants scored 284 points so it's hard to say they won.  Am I right?


Ummm, I know some folks joke around that soccer is gay and whatnot but our resident soccer fan just had Rob teabaggin' his face big time so maybe there's something to all of that talk???


Speaking of all that...the Nightmare over the Brawlers was....well...it happened...


Eric of Goon Squad fame really likes "Russ Week" so he stepped right up and delivered Ed unto Russ for Week 15 fun.




There ya have it everyone.  Once again I'm not doing the Minor League because I'm a tired and bitter cunt who wants to spend 5 minutes doing nothing.  The good news is I'm almost done with working too damn much so looking forward to that.  Here ya go...




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Philadelphia Pigskins
 
 
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PostSubject: Re: In the Books! Week 13 of 2017   Fri Dec 08, 2017 6:32 pm

I was thinking it would be fun if we tried a redo of last week. Any takers?


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Rocky Mountain Oysters
 
 
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PostSubject: Re: In the Books! Week 13 of 2017   Sat Dec 09, 2017 6:12 am

Minnesota Eternals wrote:
The largest score that lost (294.16) went to the Rocky Mountain Oysters who faced the mighty Goon Squad at the wrong damn time.

Second week in a row.



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Whiskey Creek Gadabouts
 
 
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PostSubject: Re: In the Books! Week 13 of 2017   Sat Dec 09, 2017 7:29 am

Rocky Mountain Oysters wrote:
Minnesota Eternals wrote:
The largest score that lost (294.16) went to the Rocky Mountain Oysters who faced the mighty Goon Squad at the wrong damn time.

Second week in a row.



But... big money for you!


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Rocky Mountain Oysters
 
 
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PostSubject: Re: In the Books! Week 13 of 2017   Sat Dec 09, 2017 8:03 am

Minnesota Eternals wrote:
The California Nightmare and Bergen Brawlers combined for 454.54 points which ties for the 8th lowest combined total in league history.



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Atlanta Africans
 
 
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PostSubject: Re: In the Books! Week 13 of 2017   Sat Dec 09, 2017 9:00 am

1 point off, aaaargh!!


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Littleton SilverBallers
 
 
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PostSubject: Re: In the Books! Week 13 of 2017   Sat Dec 09, 2017 9:15 am

Back to back high scores!  Oh yeah  metal


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Titletown Tyrants
 
 
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PostSubject: Re: In the Books! Week 13 of 2017   Sat Dec 09, 2017 9:57 am

Nice job Andy. I’m reading this while hung over as Hell, so it felt good to smile.


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California Nightmare
 
 
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PostSubject: Re: In the Books! Week 13 of 2017   Sat Dec 09, 2017 10:13 am

Rocky Mountain Oysters wrote:
Minnesota Eternals wrote:
The California Nightmare and Bergen Brawlers combined for 454.54 points which ties for the 8th lowest combined total in league history.


I have been trying to get into the record books all year. coffee


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Kane County Goon Squad
 
 
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PostSubject: Re: In the Books! Week 13 of 2017   Sat Dec 09, 2017 11:11 am



Laughing



Laughing Laughing Laughing




shocking shocking shocking


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Nevada NightHawks
 
 
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PostSubject: Re: In the Books! Week 13 of 2017   Sat Dec 09, 2017 11:35 am

I don't know about the rest of you, but I think Super Slow-Mo is awesome! vote yes


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California Nightmare
 
 
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PostSubject: Re: In the Books! Week 13 of 2017   Sat Dec 09, 2017 11:46 am



there is literally no words to better describe the Nightmare victory over the Brawlers. especially after Russ made it clear he was avoiding the Oysters and calling out the Nightmare to avenge his in season loss.

this left me  rofl


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Rocky Mountain Oysters
 
 
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PostSubject: Re: In the Books! Week 13 of 2017   Sat Dec 09, 2017 3:22 pm

California Nightmare wrote:


there is literally no words to better describe the Nightmare victory over the Brawlers. especially after Russ made it clear he was avoiding the Oysters and calling out the Nightmare to avenge his in season loss.

this left me  rofl

So true - I think someone even wrote a poem about it.


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Rocky Mountain Oysters
 
 
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PostSubject: Re: In the Books! Week 13 of 2017   Sat Dec 09, 2017 4:07 pm

Minnesota Eternals wrote:

Nice baps!


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Bergen Brawlers
 
 
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PostSubject: Re: In the Books! Week 13 of 2017   Sat Dec 09, 2017 8:19 pm

And reading this is like getting kicked in the nuts for a 2nd time this week.  Thanks chief!


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Maplewood Doppelgangers
 
 
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PostSubject: Re: In the Books! Week 13 of 2017   Sat Dec 09, 2017 8:51 pm

Great job Andy! I love reading this one!


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England Dragons
 
 
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PostSubject: Re: In the Books! Week 13 of 2017   Sun Dec 10, 2017 12:11 am

Good stuff Andy - always gets a laugh out of me!

And Ed, great use of the work baps. Didn't know that one has travelled!

cheers


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