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 Tales from the Crib 2.1

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California Nightmare
 
 
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PostSubject: Tales from the Crib 2.1   Thu Sep 07, 2017 1:29 pm


Season 2 Episode “Oneiromancy”

Hello bitches!



The charcoal has been lit, the faces have been painted and the kegs have been tapped… Roster Wars battles are back! After months of bidding, drafting, trading and stealing, it is finally time to regret your decisions as you struggle to pick 22 players for war.


ROCKY MOUNTAIN OYSTERS at
BERGEN BRAWLERS
The scheduling god has blessed the TT conference with a week 1 matchup that has been a year round dick measuring contest that continues to provide award winning entertainment, of course it’s Russ week. The Oysters and Brawlers have brought their RWTC rivalry to the main stage. There is more than pride on the line in this one as these teams will be playing for a grand prize of $30 real cash money homie.
Key Matchup: DeAndre Hopkins vs Dustin Hopkins.
The Oysters welcome the Brawlers to the new season with a good old fashioned passionate ass whooping.



MAPLE GROVE MEAN MACHINE at
PHILADELPHIA PIGSKINS
The Mean Machine will get their RW cherry popped in a week 1 battle with the 2016 conference champs. The Pigskins head may be a bit inflated with their success last year and the completely biased pigshit rankings being very generous to the Pisskins this year.
Key Matchup: Kirk Cousins, Rob Kelley, Zach Brown, Mason Foster, Josh Norman vs Terrelle Pryor, Jordan Reed. #HTTR
Watch the scoreboard roll back and forth early in this one until the Pigskins ultimately make the Mean Machine a prison bitch.



CHARM CITY JUSTICE at
NORTH WALES KNIGHTS
The Charm City Justice may sound like a LGBT cartoon but they are the third virgin franchise to join the TT for the 2017 season. Fortunately for the Justice they meet the gayest franchise currently in the TT conference, the Knights. Mike would be rolling over in his grave if he could see what has happened to the Empire he built after only one year.
Key Matchup: Navorro Bowman vs Cam Newton
The Justice announce their presence with authority.




SAN FRANCISCO GOLDDIGGERS at
NORFOLK BOMBERS
The Silent (Golddiggers) but Deadly (Bombers) Bowl. Get ready for the rubber match. No I am not talking about condoms... or dildos either. It’s the  After a year off from each other these two will battle it out for the fifth time in history. Post game fireworks at Hiroshima stadium are sponsored by Kim Jong-un.
Key Matchup: Mychal Kendricks (on the fucking bench) vs Eric Kendricks
Bombers explode on the Golddiggers for the dubya.



KANE COUNTY GOON SQUAD at
HAMILTON STEEL CATS
The Goons are a team on the rise. Unfortunately they are still just another turd buried deep in the litter box of the Steel Cats who are going into 2017 as the favorite to become conference champions.
Key Matchup: Irrelevant
The Steel Cats will prove they are the bigger dawg in this fight.


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Titletown Tyrants
 
 
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PostSubject: Re: Tales from the Crib 2.1   Thu Sep 07, 2017 1:32 pm

HAHA! Well done man. I missed Tales from the Crib. Great GIF's too!  party2


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Southside Spartans
 
 
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PostSubject: Re: Tales from the Crib 2.1   Thu Sep 07, 2017 1:35 pm

I love the gif's for each game!


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Rocky Mountain Oysters
 
 
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PostSubject: Re: Tales from the Crib 2.1   Thu Sep 07, 2017 1:38 pm

California Nightmare wrote:

The Oysters welcome the Brawlers to the new season with a good old fashioned passionate ass whooping.






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Alaska Arsenic
 
 
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PostSubject: Re: Tales from the Crib 2.1   Thu Sep 07, 2017 1:39 pm

Nice job asshole!


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Maplewood Doppelgangers
 
 
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PostSubject: Re: Tales from the Crib 2.1   Thu Sep 07, 2017 1:47 pm

Haha awesome job cunt-nugget! I look forward to more of these as the season rolls on!


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Charm City Justice
 
 
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PostSubject: Re: Tales from the Crib 2.1   Thu Sep 07, 2017 1:58 pm

Entertaining read Greg. That Tyson/Lil'Mac gif is awesome.


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Kane County Goon Squad
 
 
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PostSubject: Re: Tales from the Crib 2.1   Thu Sep 07, 2017 2:02 pm

always look forward to these - will be nice when I'm not the pillow biter so much


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Bergen Brawlers
 
 
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PostSubject: Re: Tales from the Crib 2.1   Thu Sep 07, 2017 2:22 pm

So I'll be that guy -- where's the 6th matchup this week?


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Titletown Tyrants
 
 
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PostSubject: Re: Tales from the Crib 2.1   Thu Sep 07, 2017 2:39 pm

Bergen Brawlers wrote:
So I'll be that guy -- where's the 6th matchup this week?



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Alaska Arsenic
 
 
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PostSubject: Re: Tales from the Crib 2.1   Thu Sep 07, 2017 2:41 pm

He said he was having some formatting problems.


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Nevada NightHawks
 
 
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PostSubject: Re: Tales from the Crib 2.1   Thu Sep 07, 2017 4:06 pm

Alaska Arsenic wrote:
He said he was having some formatting problems.  

Yea, he can't format any type of scenario to where the Nightmare will win.  






run for the hills


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Polk High Panthers
 
 
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PostSubject: Re: Tales from the Crib 2.1   Thu Sep 07, 2017 5:45 pm

LOL... Awesome stuff


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Minnesota Eternals
 
 
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PostSubject: Re: Tales from the Crib 2.1   Thu Sep 07, 2017 6:01 pm

I missed this article...so glad it's back. Nice job Greg.

I want to see your thoughts on your game though....haha


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Philadelphia Pigskins
 
 
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PostSubject: Re: Tales from the Crib 2.1   Thu Sep 07, 2017 6:03 pm

I'm glad the article is up this time. I got so many notifications of it being posted and then sent to random other posts when I clicked it.

Awesome job. Andy could add 'Gifmaster' to your sig


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Norfolk Bombers
 
 
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PostSubject: Re: Tales from the Crib 2.1   Thu Sep 07, 2017 10:25 pm

Love this. So glad it is back!


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Kane County Goon Squad
 
 
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PostSubject: Re: Tales from the Crib 2.1   Thu Sep 07, 2017 11:11 pm

dont if its better to think/hope i had the slimmest of chances for a win or get crushed in the first game of the week (Hunt)


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San Francisco Golddiggers
 
 
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PostSubject: Re: Tales from the Crib 2.1   Fri Sep 08, 2017 12:33 am

is 2.1 an upgrade?


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Maple Grove Mean Machine
 
 
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PostSubject: Re: Tales from the Crib 2.1   Fri Sep 08, 2017 12:57 pm

Imma make Nightmare my prison bitch! First, I have to make the Piggies see that he ain't the cat's meow.


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Rocky Mountain Oysters
 
 
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PostSubject: Re: Tales from the Crib 2.1   Fri Sep 08, 2017 2:14 pm

CALIFORNIA NIGHTMARE at
NAPERVILLE DIVINE
First up for the Nightmare on their potentially winless 2017 campaign are the Naperville Divine.  You would think that the heavens would show mercy but the wrath of God will strike down mightily in this matchup.  The only realistic chance the Nightmare have at a win this season is against the Brawlers.
Key Matchup: Semen vs. Suckup.
The Divine take the Nightmare on a ride they'll never forget.


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Bergen Brawlers
 
 
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PostSubject: Re: Tales from the Crib 2.1   Fri Sep 08, 2017 2:16 pm

rofl rofl

And things just became a lot more entertaining.


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Titletown Tyrants
 
 
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PostSubject: Re: Tales from the Crib 2.1   Fri Sep 08, 2017 2:30 pm

OMG that is freaking hilarious!


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Nevada NightHawks
 
 
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PostSubject: Re: Tales from the Crib 2.1   Fri Sep 08, 2017 2:31 pm

Love the fill in post to complete the article!   ROTFLMAO


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Minnesota Eternals
 
 
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PostSubject: Re: Tales from the Crib 2.1   Fri Sep 08, 2017 2:33 pm

lol 2


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Kane County Goon Squad
 
 
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PostSubject: Re: Tales from the Crib 2.1   Fri Sep 08, 2017 2:34 pm

sick sick sick


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Naperville Divine
 
 
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PostSubject: Re: Tales from the Crib 2.1   Fri Sep 08, 2017 7:11 pm

Nobody makes me laugh more than Greg.


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Hamilton Steel Cats
 
 
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PostSubject: Re: Tales from the Crib 2.1   Sat Sep 09, 2017 10:57 am

Thanks Greg. As per the norm, any post by Greg is a good post. Looking forward to 4 more months of these.

cheers


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California Nightmare
 
 
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PostSubject: Re: Tales from the Crib 2.1   Sun Sep 10, 2017 11:04 am

Titletown Tyrants wrote:
Bergen Brawlers wrote:
So I'll be that guy -- where's the 6th matchup this week?


lol3 lol 2 lol 2

My plan was to not do any of the Nightmare predictions. I came up with something that I think will work. Look for it early in week 2.


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California Nightmare
 
 
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PostSubject: Re: Tales from the Crib 2.1   Sun Sep 10, 2017 11:06 am

Nevada NightHawks wrote:
Alaska Arsenic wrote:
He said he was having some formatting problems.  

Yea, he can't format any type of scenario to where the Nightmare will win.  






run for the hills

You can run all you want... I will just sit here and wait until you wear yourself out.

Hey Bern, did you ever get my email? The subject title was "pics ;)"


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California Nightmare
 
 
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PostSubject: Re: Tales from the Crib 2.1   Sun Sep 10, 2017 11:09 am

Philadelphia Pigskins wrote:
I'm glad the article is up this time.  I got so many notifications of it being posted and then sent to random other posts when I clicked it.

Awesome job.  Andy could add 'Gifmaster' to your sig

Yeah, that was me. Issues. I am working through some new ideas for week 2 so I don't have to punch my laptop anymore.


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Kane County Goon Squad
 
 
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PostSubject: Re: Tales from the Crib 2.1   Sun Sep 10, 2017 11:10 am

California Nightmare wrote:
Nevada NightHawks wrote:
Alaska Arsenic wrote:
He said he was having some formatting problems.  

Yea, he can't format any type of scenario to where the Nightmare will win.  






run for the hills

You can run all you want... I will just sit here and wait until you wear yourself out.

Hey Bern, did you ever get my email? The subject title was "pics ;)"
Laughing Laughing Laughing


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California Nightmare
 
 
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PostSubject: Re: Tales from the Crib 2.1   Sun Sep 10, 2017 11:11 am

San Francisco Golddiggers wrote:
is 2.1 an upgrade?

Yes. It is a silent moneyshot at that fake ass publication SMAK. Next week will be another upgrade and the next and the next.


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California Nightmare
 
 
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PostSubject: Re: Tales from the Crib 2.1   Sun Sep 10, 2017 11:13 am

Rocky Mountain Oysters wrote:
CALIFORNIA NIGHTMARE at
NAPERVILLE DIVINE
First up for the Nightmare on their potentially winless 2017 campaign are the Naperville Divine.  You would think that the heavens would show mercy but the wrath of God will strike down mightily in this matchup.  The only realistic chance the Nightmare have at a win this season is against the Brawlers.
Key Matchup: Semen vs. Suckup.
The Divine take the Nightmare on a ride they'll never forget.

lol 2 laughing rofl  Brilliant.

I will be in touch shortly.


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Nevada NightHawks
 
 
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PostSubject: Re: Tales from the Crib 2.1   Sun Sep 10, 2017 11:25 am

California Nightmare wrote:
Nevada NightHawks wrote:
Alaska Arsenic wrote:
He said he was having some formatting problems.  

Yea, he can't format any type of scenario to where the Nightmare will win.  






run for the hills

You can run all you want... I will just sit here and wait until you wear yourself out.

Hey Bern, did you ever get my email? The subject title was "pics ;)"




I can't run anymore.  I accept my punishment, so give it to me.   surprised       run for the hills


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