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 Roast 10- Deuxcuntier Fugginshitshow (Bob)

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Titletown Tyrants
 
 
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PostSubject: Roast 10- Deuxcuntier Fugginshitshow (Bob)   Thu Jul 14, 2016 3:40 pm



You only roast the ones you love. Ahhh, what a saying. What a tradition. And it is the offseason, so what the hell? Let's roast eachother. One by one, we will go through rosters, franchise moves, the draft, and any personal thing you can find funny about the owner in an attempt to show your respect for them. Please take everything with a grain of salt, no hard feelings, and if someone tears you apart, go after them in their roast. Without further ado, I open up the roast of Bob, of Deuxcuntier Fugginshitshow!


Where to start, where to start. How about the name? I thought, should I put the actual name of Bob's team, or should I shame him even more for taking last twice in the 4 years of RW's existence? And I said:


Bob, I started going through your roster, and I actually started a feeling bad, trying to figure out ways that maybe you could somehow compete this year. Let's see... You have RG3, you have Foles, and you have aging Palmer as QB's. What happens when Palmer goes down again? I mean, for real, what happens?

RB's are not better. You have Melvin Gordon who was statistically the worst starting RB in the league last year, Backup Morris, Backup Henry, Snowflake bones Mathews, and 68 year old Frank Gore. That is alright, because you have good WR's and TE's.

HOLY FUCK, YOU DON'T!!!  You are telling me that you are going to trot out Tavon Austin, Allen Hurns, and .......Robert Wood as your weekly starters? That can't be right.... Right?

I am trying to figure out ways that you can compete looking at defense as well, but wow. You have good CB's...............

Ugh. Let's hope that your roster has some surprises, because people are getting sick talking about ideas for your banner.

In all seriousness Bob, you are a valued member of RW, you are an inspiration to us all, and we know you will stand up and beat the fuck out of cancer. Even with being out this long you are still 5th on the big board in posts, which just represents how much of a part of the community of RW you have been. Now get back and defend yourself vs these piranhas that are hopefully going to pile on!




Last edited by Titletown Tyrants on Mon Jul 18, 2016 1:19 pm; edited 1 time in total
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Minnesota Eternals
 
 
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PostSubject: Re: Roast 10- Deuxcuntier Fugginshitshow (Bob)   Thu Jul 14, 2016 4:20 pm

Don't have the time to roast right now but wanted to mention that I have been in contact with Bob very recently and we should be having a sighting very soon so this is great timing here.


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Tarpon Springs RedKnights
 
 
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PostSubject: Re: Roast 10- Deuxcuntier Fugginshitshow (Bob)   Thu Jul 14, 2016 5:05 pm

Bob is a real fighter, he tells cancer to fuck off and doesn't give up. I have nothing but respect. As for his team he keeps us losers from ever worrying about pink. Thus he protects us each and every year. Thank you Bob.


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England Dragons
 
 
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PostSubject: Re: Roast 10- Deuxcuntier Fugginshitshow (Bob)   Thu Jul 14, 2016 5:14 pm

Bob is English slang for poo. Looking at the roster, that's appropriate.

shitstorm


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Naperville Divine
 
 
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PostSubject: Re: Roast 10- Deuxcuntier Fugginshitshow (Bob)   Thu Jul 14, 2016 5:28 pm

This one is too easy. It would have been more challenging to find something positive about Bob's team. In a game of high/low, Bob obviously has chosen low. Perhaps Bob is tanking so he gets the #1 pick. Fortunately for me, I own his #1 pick. Can you say "Len Fournette".

In defense of Bob, he has other things to worry about than trying to figure out how to fix his team. He obviously doesn't work very hard on it. Vampires work harder during the day than Bob works on his team. He is the Roster Wars version of the 2016 Cleveland Browns. He has no chance, but we all love him and win that we pick up when we play him.

God Bless Bob.


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Mohawk Ridge Marauders
 
 
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PostSubject: Re: Roast 10- Deuxcuntier Fugginshitshow (Bob)   Thu Jul 14, 2016 5:50 pm

Bob beats cancer! He's awesome! I love Bobbo.


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Minnesota Eternals
 
 
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PostSubject: Re: Roast 10- Deuxcuntier Fugginshitshow (Bob)   Thu Jul 14, 2016 6:14 pm

One of the funniest things about Bob is the naked Justin that's usually wrapped around him. Gross.


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Norfolk Bombers
 
 
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PostSubject: Re: Roast 10- Deuxcuntier Fugginshitshow (Bob)   Thu Jul 14, 2016 6:15 pm

Mohawk Ridge Marauders wrote:
Bob beats cancer!  He's awesome!  I love Bobbo.


good post


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Titletown Tyrants
 
 
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PostSubject: Re: Roast 10- Deuxcuntier Fugginshitshow (Bob)   Thu Jul 14, 2016 7:08 pm

Minnesota Eternals wrote:
One of the funniest things about Bob is the naked Justin that's usually wrapped around him.  Gross.

Wait, what?


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Mohawk Ridge Marauders
 
 
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PostSubject: Re: Roast 10- Deuxcuntier Fugginshitshow (Bob)   Thu Jul 14, 2016 7:30 pm

Titletown Tyrants wrote:
Minnesota Eternals wrote:
One of the funniest things about Bob is the naked Justin that's usually wrapped around him.  Gross.

Wait, what?

Don't be jealous.


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Titletown Tyrants
 
 
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PostSubject: Re: Roast 10- Deuxcuntier Fugginshitshow (Bob)   Thu Jul 14, 2016 7:38 pm

I thought you were a Pokemon virgin, now you are in the sack with Bob? I don't know which is more strange. lol 2


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Naperville Divine
 
 
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PostSubject: Re: Roast 10- Deuxcuntier Fugginshitshow (Bob)   Thu Jul 14, 2016 9:55 pm

What kind of roast is this?


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Titletown Tyrants
 
 
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PostSubject: Re: Roast 10- Deuxcuntier Fugginshitshow (Bob)   Thu Jul 14, 2016 10:21 pm

Sorry, back to basics. Bob sucks!


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Indiana Mayhem
 
 
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PostSubject: Re: Roast 10- Deuxcuntier Fugginshitshow (Bob)   Fri Jul 15, 2016 8:06 am

I see back to back pink years in your future


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Bergen Brawlers
 
 
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PostSubject: Re: Roast 10- Deuxcuntier Fugginshitshow (Bob)   Fri Jul 15, 2016 8:18 am

Bob likes the Colts!  Ha!

We miss you buddy!


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Whiskey Creek Gadabouts
 
 
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PostSubject: Re: Roast 10- Deuxcuntier Fugginshitshow (Bob)   Fri Jul 15, 2016 8:57 am

Naperville Divine wrote:
Vampires work harder during the day than Bob works on his team.  



I love this. lol

rofl


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Atlanta Africans
 
 
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PostSubject: Re: Roast 10- Deuxcuntier Fugginshitshow (Bob)   Fri Jul 15, 2016 9:03 am

Bob was convinced Alex Smith was a QB1 mock

... then he traded him away for Theo Riddick


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Kane County Goon Squad
 
 
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PostSubject: Re: Roast 10- Deuxcuntier Fugginshitshow (Bob)   Fri Jul 15, 2016 9:22 am

Indiana Mayhem wrote:
I see back to back pink years in your future

I think Bob secretly likes pink


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Minnesota Eternals
 
 
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PostSubject: Re: Roast 10- Deuxcuntier Fugginshitshow (Bob)   Fri Jul 15, 2016 2:32 pm

I wonder if Bob is sucking to this extent to see if I can run out of ideas to shame his old ass or to see if we as a league are willing to exclude him from the shame race because it's a given that his team is gonna be the worst forever.


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Titletown Tyrants
 
 
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PostSubject: Re: Roast 10- Deuxcuntier Fugginshitshow (Bob)   Sat Jul 16, 2016 5:50 pm

Atlanta Africans wrote:
Bob was convinced Alex Smith was a QB1 mock

... then he traded him away for Theo Riddick

Did he have these thoughts about Smith coming out of college? Because if he thought that in the past 5 years, I understand why he's been pink twice.


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Littleton SilverBallers
 
 
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PostSubject: Re: Roast 10- Deuxcuntier Fugginshitshow (Bob)   Sat Jul 16, 2016 11:26 pm

I want to write something bad about Bob, but just can't..... So the only thing I will say is. Your team sucks Bob. And I wish you the best of luck.


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Rocky Mountain Oysters
 
 
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PostSubject: Re: Roast 10- Deuxcuntier Fugginshitshow (Bob)   Sun Jul 17, 2016 7:44 am



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Titletown Tyrants
 
 
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PostSubject: Re: Roast 10- Deuxcuntier Fugginshitshow (Bob)   Tue Jul 19, 2016 9:27 am

Minnesota Eternals wrote:
Don't have the time to roast right now but wanted to mention that I have been in contact with Bob very recently and we should be having a sighting very soon so this is great timing here.

Still waiting on Bob, you need to stand up for yourself here buddy! Hope you are well.


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Morrison Minions
 
 
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PostSubject: Re: Roast 10- Deuxcuntier Fugginshitshow (Bob)   Tue Jul 19, 2016 9:35 am

Bob's team is pink

shit happens


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Whiskey Creek Gadabouts
 
 
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PostSubject: Re: Roast 10- Deuxcuntier Fugginshitshow (Bob)   Tue Jul 19, 2016 9:51 am

Morrison Minions wrote:
Bob's team is pink

shit happens

In other news... water is wet.


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Philadelphia Pigskins
 
 
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PostSubject: Re: Roast 10- Deuxcuntier Fugginshitshow (Bob)   Tue Jul 19, 2016 10:10 am

Bob has an interesting strategy.  Have a shitty roster, so you lose a lot of games, and then trade away your picks so other teams reap the benefits.  Also, don't have any WB.  I'm curious to see how it plays out for him.



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Morrison Minions
 
 
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PostSubject: Re: Roast 10- Deuxcuntier Fugginshitshow (Bob)   Tue Jul 19, 2016 12:36 pm

Whiskey Creek Gadabouts wrote:
Morrison Minions wrote:
Bob's team is pink

shit happens

In other news... water is wet.

I figure that's all the roasting that he needs. It says all we need to know.


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